In 2012, I did a “world tour” of a hoopdance class, teaching a choreography starting in California and across the US, through Europe and ending in Australia. And that is the last time I saw Jewelz, who was the organiser of Hoopy Happenings outside Sydney.
Until last week. Jewelz is on her own world tour this year and her first stop was Japan.
Even though we haven’t seen one another in 14 years and we don’t keep close contact online, it was easy to fall back into the friendship we’d cultivated from 2008 to 2012.
I learned that this ability to pick up right where you left off is called “dormant ties” in psychological circles. People who share formative experiences like travel, creative pursuits, and life milestones build durable bonds. Their memories together are rich and emotionally anchored rather than just day-to-day habit.
Jewelz is a bright spark, literally and figuratively, in a drab world. Everywhere we went for the next couple of days, her cheerful presence caught attention. Morita-san and her husband just loved having a visitor at the weaving ezxhibition all the way from Australia! A woman walking her dog at Maebara beach stopped to comment on her fashion. Many conversations happened that I’d never think to start. Kids played with her; dogs loved her. Even Maura curled up with her.
We also had some quiet, introspective time with a sensory meditation walk along the Mineoka forest road and drawing after that, too.
And we talked about our work around “end of life” topics – me with The International Resident’s Ending Note, and Jewelz as host of a death cafe and work as a death doula. It’s interesting that we have both turned in that direction. I wonder if our circus backgrounds have made us unafraid of facing the facts and emotions around death.
Our time together was short, but I think we renewed our durable bonds.
