My mind is a whirlwind, even when I calm it.
This morning in Satoyama Yoga we sat in silent meditation. We do this every month on the 2nd Sunday and at this point the regular members of my class have been introduced to dozens of ways to practice. Today after stretching our bodies, we each found our own way to sit in meditation for twenty minutes.
Although I am well practiced in meditation, it’s quite the odd experience every time. I look like I’m meditating. But what is actually happening inside? Here is what was going on all seemingly simultaneously:
- I was doing the practice. I sat still and quiet, hands folded into a simple mudra. Relaxed breathing. Feeling the inner stillness. Truly peaceful.
- My mind was replaying a favorite song. My subconscious often sends me messages via music, so OK Go’s Here It Goes Again was my meditation mantra. The lyrics are appropriate.
- I was occasionally distracted by my loud tinnitus.
- My teacher’s mind was tending class. Partly via an inner sense of time, but also an occasional peek at the clock and the Zoom screen to make sure everyone was okay.
- I observed the busy activity in my mind and noticed how despite the music, the timekeeping, and distractions, I was still able to keep my inner core still and at least a portion of my brain fully focussed on the meditation.
- And at the same time as all of that I was drafting the blog post in my head. Just before I brought everyone out of the session, I snapped a photo.
Despite the multiple threads of inner action, I feel refreshed and grounded from the practice.
It could be ten but then again I can’t remember
Half and hour since a quarter to four.
Throw on your clothes, the second side of Surfer Rosa
And you leave me with my jaw on the floor.
Hey!
Oh, just when you think you’re in control
Just when you think you’ve got a hold
Just when you get on a roll
Oh, here it goes, here it goes, here it goes again
Oh, here it goes again
I should’ve known, should’ve known, should’ve known again
But here is goes again…
Oh, oh, here it goes again
Starts out easy, something simple, something sleazy
Something inching past the edge of reserve.
Now through the lines of cheap Venetian blinds
Your car is pulling off of the curb.
Hey!
Oh, just when you think you’re in control
Just when you think you’ve got a hold
Just when you get on a roll
Oh, here it goes, here it goes, here it goes again
Oh, here it goes again
I should’ve known, should’ve known, should’ve known again
But here it goes again
Oh, here it goes
Oh, here it goes
Oh, here it goes again
Oh, oh, here it goes again
I guess there’s gotta be a break in the monotony
But Jesus when it rains how it pours
Throw on your clothes, the second side of Surfer Rosa
And you leave me; yeah you leave me.
Oh, oh here it goes, here it goes, here it goes again
Oh, here it goes again
I should’ve known, should’ve known, should’ve known again
But here it goes again
I should’ve known
Oh, oh, yeah, I should’ve known
Oh, here it goes again
Oh, oh, here it goes again
